The Life
by Araea Swiftwind
Summary: I’m really not as bad as everyone makes me out to be. To the outside world, I am nothing but a monster, but to Rin…my dear, sweet Rin…I am everything.


**The Life**

**By:** Yuki of the Kamikaze

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Inuyasha…so don't sue and don't ask.

**Warning:** This story has C/D, OC, mild pedophilia (In that an older person is in love with a younger person) but no molestation, and it might be sad. If this sounds wrong to you, or isn't your cup of tea, please leave this story now, and don't flame me. Remember, it is your choice to read this story; you read at your own risk.

(A/N at the bottom)

* * *

_I'm really not as bad as everyone makes me out to be. To the outside world, I am nothing but a monster, but to Rin…my dear, sweet Rin…I am everything._

**The Beginning**

I met this small, human child many years ago. She had been attacked and killed by wolves. For the first time in my life, I had felt pity for one of the disgusting, putrid humans. I saved her. I can't explain my actions, and I won't degrade myself by trying. I did what I did. End of story.

From the moment I met this small, dirty human child she was indebted to me. She brought me food when I was hurt and she believed me to be hungry. She came back, even when I ignored her. I didn't know it then, but the little Rin had fallen in love with me, the merciless demon. And neither did she know that I had fallen for her…forever.

**The Journey**

Rin traveled with me after I retuned her life to her. She was my only human companion. Jaken, my demonic servant, hated her presence, which caused me to like her even more. There was not always animosity between Rin and Jaken. Quite frequently Jaken looked out for Rin…under my orders, of course. I always had one eye out for the troublesome Rin. She was always getting into some form of trouble. I couldn't explain why I cared so, but regardless of the reasoning, I protected her.

When Rin was kidnapped, I dropped everything to save her. It was then that I realized how very in love I was with her, though she was only a small, human child. I thought that if I lost her, I wouldn't have the will to go on. My heart, my ice-cold demon heart, stopped the moment she was whisked away from me. It only restarted once she was safely returned to my arms.

The connection between Rin and myself was a strong one, yet a private one. I let no one see how deeply I cared for her, though; the little human had no such qualms. Everyone in the land knew of her devotion to me. Only Kagura knew the truth. Only she knew how deeply the love ran between Rin and I. And only Kagura had a problem with the relationship.

The demon borne of Naraku hated the relationship that Rin and I shared. She hated it because she, herself, was in love with me. For many years, she pined away for me, hoping to one day obtain my attention. She received it, but it was not the attention that she had wished for, only that which she deserved. The only things I willingly gave Kagura were my scorn and distaste. I had eyes only for my dear Rin…and perhaps that is why things ended the way they did.

**The Romance**

As Rin aged, my love for her grew. By the time she was of age, there was no one else in my world. My eyes never looked twice at anyone else. My heart had been given to her long ago, and it was hers to do with as she pleased. As the fates would have it, Rin only wanted to love me, and take care of my heart. For that, I was grateful. I spent my days entertaining Rin with stories of my past and I spent my nights entertaining her body with mine. Our love had never been so pure. I had never been so content.

Months after we began consummating our relationship, we learned that Rin was with child. The pregnancy was complicated and Rin nearly lost her life delivering our only child. The young babe was a half-demon…destined to be scorned by all, save her family. But we worried not for our daughter. We knew that the love we would give to her would be enough to raise her well. And it did.

**The Pain**

Since the day our only daughter was born, Rin had been in poor health. I worried about her constantly, as did Ritsuka. We did not know if Rin would come out of it, or if the sickness would claim her life. In the end, it was not the sickness that claimed my dearest Rin. It was a demon. And now, he is dead as well. I promised, many years ago, that I would protect Rin from harm, and for most of her life, that is exactly what I did. But in the end, it was not enough. I failed; I paid the price.

Every day I look at my only child, Ritsuka, and see the shadow of her mother within her. I feel remorse for my failure to keep my love safe, and I feel guilt for leaving my daughter without her mother. And as the days go by, I grow bitter. Why is it that I lost the one I love so soon? She was young when she died, not even into her grey hairs. Ritsuka tries to get me to move on, but how can I with my failure staring me in the face every day?

**The Conclusion**

I am near the end of my life now…my impossibly long, impossibly lonely life. My brother, though I loathe him for having something I never did, sits at my bedside and watches over me. Ritsuka, several years previous, left to make her way in the world. She grew tired of babysitting her bitter, hostile father. I do not blame her.

Inuyasha's wife, Kagome, makes me dinner every night. I missed that in the years without Rin by my side. For the first time since my dearest Rin was brutally ripped from me, I have a family again. My nieces and nephews run around this small shrine we live in. It saddens me most days because I think about what could have been if Rin was still with me. I know that Kagome sees my pain, but I do not care anymore. Let her see. Let the world see how the mighty Inu no Taisho has fallen.

I am merely the shell of what I once was. It has been years since I have slain a demon. My mind can scarcely remember the last time I laid with a woman that was not my dearest Rin. I no longer instill fear in the hearts of humans and demons alike. I am nothing. My weary eyes close, and my last thoughts before I join my dearest Rin seep into the forefront of my mind. _I was really not as bad as everyone made me out to be. To the outside world, I was nothing but a monster, but to Rin…my dear, sweet Rin…I was everything. I am coming, Rin…my love._

* * *

A/N: So, it is finished. I know, I know…I should be working on one of my other stories, like Divine Wind, or Boy London…but I just couldn't help myself. I was looking up sexy pictures of Sesshoumaru…and the inspiration for this story struck me. So many of the pictures I found showed the happy, or sad, side of Sesshy. So, I wrote this story to accommodate that. I know some people might find this story to be a little OOC, but I don't care. I think that deep down, Lord Sesshoumaru is softer than we make him out to be. Anyways, I hope everyone enjoyed reading this story. Please review and let me know what you think.


End file.
